Love Shouldn't Hurt, or Why Pink Is Sending The Wrong Message To Her Fans

I was going to write this post about David Cameron's ability to announce a proposal on regulating online porn whilst somehow simultaneously showing the big thumbs up to Page 3.  Unfortunately some of the ignorant comments I've heard surrounding this topic this week have left me filled with a rage so potent I can't string my thoughts into coherent sentences...so I'll let The Kraken tackle that topic instead (warning, not for the easily offended). Instead, I'm going to discuss something that has been irking me.  And although it is not a topic uniquely feminist in nature, I think this is the best heading to post it under.

Just how many songs is Pink going to release about being in unhappy, dysfunctional relationships? This is an issue that has been bugging me for weeks now, especially as True Love seems to be leaking out of most speakers I come within earshot of. When I first heard it I was very taken with the music video – I love that Lily Allen has poked her head out of semi-retirement, and I got quite excited to see the Ikea veg getting their MTV debut. But then I listened to the lyrics. And then I got sad.

Just once try to wrap your little brain around my feelings, just once try not to be so mean

Sometimes I hate every single stupid word you say, sometimes I wanna slap you in your whole face

When a lot of her songs seem to be about being in love with someone you hate and who treats you like dirt (or whom you enjoy treating like dirt), what sort of message is Pink sending to her audience? An audience of which I suppose a large proportion is probably in their teens. As was highlighted recently by the This Is Abuse campaign, abusive relationships are not just the being abusive) and instead mistake that sort of thing for passion, or assume that what they are experiencing is normal. When a celebrity who is portrayed as strong, edgy and highly admirable is singing about dysfunctional relationship after dysfunctional relationship - all justified by the backdrop of lurve - the message is reinforced that manipulation and aggression from your partner is a sign that they care.
domain of adults. Sadly though, many teens in such relationships may not identify themselves as being abused (or indeed as

Love as a young adult is a powerful emotion that can strip rationality and perspective from even the smartest and most secure teenager. It can be consuming and engulfing in a way that adult relationships can rarely be, once responsibilities and wariness have kicked in. Many teen relationships take on a “us against the world” theatricality which reduces the likelihood that they will seek advice and help when things get a little heavy handed. Particularly if this is their first real relationship, they don’t have other experiences to compare it to and so will look to the examples around them...like their favourite singer, or other media like films (thanks, Twilight).

I know some people will argue that I am seeing too much into this, that it’s a song about those times where our other half is just getting under our skin and we would love to metaphorically throttle them. But Pink is a repeat offender with songs of this type (seriously, check the lyrics for Please Don’t Leave Me). The twinkly music, cutesy video and possibly the fact she is a female singing pop disguises the undertones, but just think about this – if the same song was performed by a thrash metal group, with the lyrics screamed out by a male vocalist, would it all seem so innocent then?